I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
