this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
