2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
