I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
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