you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize