What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
