But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
