I think im going to throw up on grandma
i can't believe i had my finger in that
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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