Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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