Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize