I just made out with a guy for $7.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
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