It's like God shit irony all over that family
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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