He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
