It's a beautiful day for a hangover
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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