I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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