You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
