Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
i believe in u and ur pee
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
