I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
