he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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