Do vagina's smell?
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
did i walk over a car last night?
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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