Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
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