she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
