sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize
