i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
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