i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
