Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Randomize