Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
