Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Randomize
