that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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