Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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