Three words: puerto rican gang bang
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
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