I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Randomize
