You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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