if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize
