i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
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