so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
