I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
