She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
try to milk me bitch
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