Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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