I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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