I'm going to jail i love you
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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