i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Randomize
