I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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