I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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