dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Randomize
