I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
