sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Randomize
