Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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