Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
FUCK WHALES
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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