you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Randomize
